theliv

I finished my beth moore study today. I really just want to share with you what I learned and what I am continuing to learn and struggle with….

I guess, I'm just asking for a minute where I can be honest with you.

The story I am going to share with you is the one of the Prodigal Son. I'm sure you know it. This little section really spoke to me, today as I sat in the Great Hall. I hope it is encouraging to you, as well.

"And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him." Luke 15:19

Beth Moore said, on this topic, 'Do you want to go home but, like the progial, would you feel better about the whole thing if you just went b ack as a servant instead of a son? It will never work. Thousands do it, but it never brings relief. They work maniacally trying to make up to God for what they've done. "I am not longer worthy to be called your son." They never were. They just never knew. They'd feel better if they could just take a beating like a runaway slave returned to the taskmaster. Don't you realize, you've already had a beating? Oh, I see. You just want to pay some kind of penance for what you've done. You still have way too much ego."

The question she then asks is,'How is self-punishment a form of ego?' ask yourself this question…

I've been thinking a lot about this today. There is no 'penance' needed, not even for the prodigal. Going home as a servant instead of a child won't work. You won't find true healing in that. Its fake. By going back as a servant and trying to deny yourself of your birthright only places a 'band-aid' over your wound, as a sweet friend of mine once told me. It will cause you more heartache and trouble later on, not only in your life but also inn your relationships.

You won't be healed any other way, besides going back to your Father's HEART. Do not go back to your His table to eat the crumbs on the floor like a dog. Think more of His redemption than that. Do not go back to your Father's house just to be safe. He wants far more for you than that. You will never heal if you only go back to your Father's home. You must go back to His HEART. Closer than you've ever been.

Rejoice not over me, O my enemy, When I fall, I shall rise; When I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me! -Micah 7:8

Claim this verse. Memorize it. Do whatever you have to do to engrain this TRUTH in your heart, soul, and mind…

be encouraged and know that you are a son/daughter of the king….John 8:32

    There are two things that I have been thinking a lot about, recently. Love and Healing. Pretty distinct and maybe not related but I kind of think there might be a connection.

    I know what your thinking, 'What has Olivia been thinking about love?' Well…its not your typical 'lovey-dovey, he's a cutie' kind of love-not anywhere near it really. More like, the love of a Father. An Eternal Father. What does that look like in my own life? Do I really understand and accept the truth that God's love for me is unfathomable and so much more than I can ever imagine?! Am I allowing Him to use me to love on His children who are broken, lost, and hurting? Am I loving on those friends of mine who are far away from me for a season?….These thoughts have been running around in my mind the last couple of days and can I just tell you something? It has been incredible.

    Healing. 'What does that girl mean?' I know I say a lot of really random stuff on this thing but honestly its really just me having a conversation with you. Im talking out loud and thinking through stuff. So just hang in there or not read it at all, you decide whether or not you want to listen.

    A lot of stuff has been going on around here and by here I mean Covenant College and my life. Without being too vague, I am going through a lot of changes, I guess you could say. From friends being away for a season to trying to figure out what is the root of my problems? I firmly believe that we all have 'baggage' in a sense. We all carry around 'stuff' that has strongholds in our lives. Thing that we all know are not from Abba. Whether or not you decide to deal with them and find healing is your issue, but for me-I want freedom.

    Someone really dear to me once told me, 'every time someone hurts you or wounds you in anyway, a lie is usually attached to that wound. ' I know that to be truth because it is in my own life and in several of my friends' lives. Wanting to be freed from the chains that entangle us is the first step. Humbling yourself enough to go to a counselor or to seek out a friend and just talk things through is the beginning point in which healing can occur.
How are healing and love connected, your probably wondering. For me at this time in my life and with certain people I am extremely close with, they are. They are interconnected because a way that I can love my friend is to find healing for myself. They know that I need it and they want me to be free. Another way would be in order for me to best love them, I have to find healing. I am a broken 'ship' that needs mending and repairing before I can go back out into battle.

    I'm not sure if any of this makes sense but I hope you can catch a glimpse of what I am trying to say. I never said I was good with words, I just like to use them-a lot. I hope this challenges you to think about areas in your life where you need Jesus to break the chains that have so long enslaved you. Know that I am praying for us, the body of Christ. That we would no longer pretend like we are all ok. It is ok to not be ok, friend.

    For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." -Romans 8:15

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1 Corinthians 10:13

This was the 'theme' verse for my bible study this morning. The whole section was addressing the issue of 'strong walls.' How important it really is to maintain and foster strong walls in our spiritual lives so that Satan can not even begin to lay ground work. The first question it asked, of me, was to examine my own life and to see where the enemy might be beginning to lay ground work in order to break down my 'walls' and to get in. After careful thought and consideration I came up with a few thoughts on how the enemy might be beginning to work in order to tear me down and get to me.
While the first step is recognizing what those weaknesses are in your own life there is an amazing truth that you should know. Our bodies ARE the temple of God's and Satan cannot fully 'get in us.' An interesting visual that Beth Moore shared was there is a large rectangle. Within that large rectangle is a smaller one where your heart, the holy spirit that dwells within you. Satan cannot get in there but he can get inside the large circle, the outer court yard (similar to how the temple was set up in the Old Testament). Check out Ephesians 1:13 as to why Satan cannot 'get in us' but can only get into the 'outer court yard.'

One very prominent way that Satan can get to us is if we refuse to let the holy spirit have authority over us, by choosing not to yield to him. In essence, we grieve the holy spirit (Eph. 4:30). By not allowing him to have full authority over our lives he reytreats his activity and fullness in us, sometimes even to the point that we may not sense his presence. Even though that is true, he neither departs from us or lies stagnant. If the Spirit of Christ is within us, we cannot just simply continue in sin. The absence of both his activity and the feeling of his presence will eventually create such a void within our hearts that we will not be able to stand it any longer (When Godly People Do Ungodly things, p. 66).

Another way that the enemy is likely to break our walls and get inside, by putting pressure on the outside hoping to get a reaction or to get cooperation from you, on the inside. Two ways that he might 'put pressure on our walls' is by tempting us or causing us to go through turmoil. Both of these can be extremely stumbling blocks if we have not surrendered everything to our father! Holding on to even a little piece of whatever will become a weakness and satan will attack you through that! You cannot begin to live fully IN him unless you live apart from yourself.

Like a City whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control. Proverbs 25:28

Only self can decide who is in control. When self grants control to the Holy spirit and we live within the boundaries of God's will for ous lives, our wall stands firm and Satan must work from more of a distance. He is limited to opposition rather than outright oppression. But when self rejects control of the holy spirit then we give way to things like anger, bitterness, rage, lust, greed, ambition, despair, sexual addictions, etc (When Godly people do ungodly things, p. 68). Like I said earlier, satan cannot get into us but when we reject the complete control of the holy spirit then a piece of our wall breaks down and we become vunerable and suseptible to the attacks of Satan.

God, grant us discernment and wisdom to figure out what areas in our lives are weaknesses and not of you and what you desire for us, your children. Grant us courage and strength to confront those issues and to take them to a friend and have accountability and to take them to YOU so that we might have freedom in you, alone. Draw us near to you, God. We want to be a people that proclaim your name everywhere we go and to have the signature of Jesus emblazened upon our hearts….

people are interesting. I don't think I will ever grow tired of going to starbucks, or a local coffee shop, sitting there among chaos, sipping on an iced chai tea latte with soy, and listening to a friends heart and hearing what God has been teaching them. I really can't see me ever NOT loving those moments because that is what I was made for. I was created, partly, to bear my friends burdens and to help them carry it to the cross. The other part was created to glorify God in everything, even in loving a friend.

Looking back over my highschool years brings a smile to my face because 1. I did a lot of learning and growing up with God 2. I developed incredible friendships and 3. I started to realize how to love and serve people in ways I never dreamed where possible. One of the biggest things that influenced me, during highschool, was the relationships I had with people who asked me 'hard questions.' You know what im talking about, the how are you doing? What have you been reading lately? What has God been teaching you? Have you been spending time in the word? What has consumed your thoughts the most this week? What have you been struggling with? The questions that you typically don't want to ask yourself because you know the answer your going to give is probably far from where it should be. But honestly, don't you crave for someone to ask those questions?

I would argue that we all hunger for someone to ask us those questions. For someone to call us up, ask us if we have time to go to starbucks and just sit there and talk-without an agenda. To take time out of your schedule to go and sit down and just talk with someone speaks volumes about your character and what you value most. It goes so much deeper when the center of your conversation is of Christ and what you have been struggling with and such. We all are dying to be asked, but yet no one seems to care at times.

I want to challenge us all to be 'that' person who calls someone up and just talks with them. Catching up on life and asking those hard questions. Inside a lot of us don't really want to answer them but if you really looked deep enough, we all want to. Its just a matter if someone cares enough to ask us. A lot of the problem, these days, is that people are in such a hurry to get from point a to point b that they don't ever stop and just listen. They are too focused on themselves and what they are doing to ever realize that the person sitting next to them is hurting emotionally, physically, or spiritually. We would never know because we never wanted to. We never took the time to even notice.

I pray that you all are encouraged by this and begin to understand how necessary it is for us to get outside of ourselves and to just listen……

we need realize that Jesus had a passion for people….why should we be any different if our heart's desire is to be like him?

Grant us the courage to be able to ask those who are hurting how they are doing. Open our eyes and our minds to be able to discern who those people are and how we might love and serve each one. May this be the cry of our heart and may we be burdened for the crippled, lost, and hurting…

People going off to foreign lands to fulfil God's call in their life. This isn't new. It shoulden't surprise us when we hear of it. Our first thoughts shoulden't be, 'How will they survive without______'..you fill in the blank. We need to shut up and start praying. This is what God called us to do. All throughout scriptures you never find Jesus and His disciples staying in ONE place. They move. They take the word. They bring it. To a world of unbelievers. How can we sit in our homes so comfortably and do nothing when there are people dying because they believe in a man called 'JESUS?'…

People who leave their lifestyle here in America to go serve over in asia, africa, wherever should not be abnormal. It should be the 'norm.' Why is it so different and foreign to our minds? It isn't so much abnormal to our minds as it is abnormal to our hearts. If your first thought when hearing of someone going to serve in a different country is 'why,' then your missing something in your heart. something bigger than you or i.

May we all strive to be like Jesus and not stay in one place-unless we are called to do that, which some of us will be. And that is ok. May we be sensitive to the Spirit. May we learn to hear the quiet and still voice of God when he whispers into our hearts. May we Go when we are told and not back down.

For if we disobey..we are glorifying Satan. He wants us to be afraid. To not have courage. Not to be brave and bold. May we turn our face and run toward the cross instead of turning our side and hoping we will be able to see when it is our turn. May our livbes not represent a comfortable lifestyle. But one that is so uncomfortable it causes us to grow and fall deeper into the depths of His love….

this is my prayer and my thoughts….do with it what you will.

'Come, everyone who thirsts, come to the waters; and he who has no money, come buy, and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without price. Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy? Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good, and delight yourselves in rich food.'
-Isaiah 55: 1-2